I haven't blogged this week because I have been re-losing weight already ostensibly lost after last week's family reunion. I have been "working at home" but full of so much procrastination anxiety. Today I'm determined to finish (but I was yesterday and the day before that too). Anyway I have been weighing myself and raising my eyes about the scale and the challenge of getting a legitimate or a reportable or a dependable number to claim as my weight of the day. I have no unnecessary sense of compunction to get it absolutely right all the time. I am sure if I am losing weight the scale will eventually show a definitive weight loss. Today I had a range that is significantly less than the range I was working with at the beginning of this diet.
And the number I report is 299.7. The first time I stood on the scale I weighed more than I did yesterday which was very demoralizing but then I remembered I get to try again! I stand on the scale which is cramped up near the wall and towel rod and next to the kitty litter box, and I hold my belly back so I can look down and read the number. If my weight is forward on my feet, I weigh more. If I'm leaning back a little bit, I weigh less. And I generally wobble back and forth until my scale either picks something or gives up.
299.7! Nice to feel ok choosing a number under 300 again. I'm back under 300, possibly! I don't remember the actual number I chose so you get a 299.7.
I am still dieting. Since I'm definitely finishing my work tonight (definitely, definitely) I should have time this weekend to relax and go back to the grocery store for next week, maybe even prepare some meals in advance. This week, rather than work getting in the way of the diet, the diet has got in the way of work, as every time I hope I might be able to get some focus built up, I have to go make a meal. Which I then eat, often in front of the TV for an hour.
But I have to finish tonight, so maybe I'd better sign off.
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