July 26? 27? 239.7

I may have jumped the gun on the smiling thing. Maybe it was a passing glimpse of what's to come. I tried taking some smiling face portraits, and didn't like the results. I went to check the bathroom mirror, and sure enough, still had the same problems. But I saw it the other night, so I'm sure it's coming.

Today I was a hair under 240 - we'll call it 239.7 and hurrah! welcome me into the incredible 230s and on the final stretch to having lost an incredible 50 pounds. Seems like only yesterday I started this thing. Before I started this blog, weight loss had been well-paced, then when I started the blog I plateau'ed. Then suddenly it all started coming off rapidly (probably a menstrual effect.) It's hard not to let myself get too used to this rapid weight loss pace. I had the notion to get pissed off that I just went and bought 2 pairs of size 20 jeans and I may not wear them for that long. I haven't even worn one pair - I've saved those to be "good jeans" and these I'm wearing now are everyday/work jeans.

I've had 4 silk shirts collecting dust in a corner of my room since I moved into this place 3 years ago. They need to be dry-cleaned, and - hello? - I just don't include dry-cleaning in my budget! These silk blouses are the same blouse in 4 colors - purple, pink, beige, and red. The purple and red are my favorites, the pastel ones accomplish a different, more "refined" sort of look. Anyway, they were too small for me. Now they fit again. This is awesomeness. It's nice to shrink into the clothes that were too small for you. Now I might actually have to take them to the dry-cleaners.

Do you losers ever feel awkward about being around your friends who are staying fat? My friend continues to be supportive when the subject of the diet comes up, that I don't sense any resentment from her, so that's good, and I try not to let self-pride turn to gloating, or self-righteousness lead to unrequested advice. I just had an imagination that I did get thin and that it made her feel bad about herself, and that wouldn't do at all.

So, I'm having a hard time getting out the door today.

I realized that this nocturnal thing means I've pushed my meals back. I just ate yesterday's breakfast, and it's 4:00 a.m. the next day. Yesterday I went to get a Red Bull before work and was craving sweets to like an unprecedented degree. I bought a Baby Ruth and ate 1/3 of it. I realized that when I come out of this nocturnal thing, I might have spread out a week's worth of food to 8 days. Going nocturnal gets confusing - what counts as morning, what counts as today's date? What time should I get up, how long should I stay awake today, am I sleepy? But that could explain hunger, and rapid weight loss, I suppose.

Anyway I just ate yesterday's breakfast and snack. I have lunch packed and I need to go get to work so I can get something done before everyone comes in in the morning. Then I have to go grocery shopping for this week's food. And I would like to get some exercise. I was sure I was going to do it this morning before I went to sleep, but then I got too tired. It's past being too long since I've got some exercise - that's not even a diet thing, just a general health and well-being thing.